This time that I am now living in.

This time that I am now living in. I can’t say that I have any confidence in how to proceed. Based on previous experiences with market bubbles that burst, I believe that I will probably lose my job in the next year due to the market taking a tumble. My game plan for what should follow is rather slim. I would like to reach a stable place where I have firmly decided that I am going to learn and do one thing incredibly well, and stick with it.

I wish that I could describe what it feels like to have the aging process slowly creeping in. My mind wants to wander and chase down whatever dreams pop up under my eyelids. I no longer have this hard, solid sense of urgency about me, to learn and do one thing especially well. It’s almost like I’d rather just read books, watch TV and get drunk. And, I don’t mean books of any substance, either.

In earlier years, I might have read a lot into what is happening with the world, and become convinced that everything we know to be good and true and pleasant is about to end as we move into a stage where the US is piss poor and half of it is missing from some terrible misadventure caused by a reckless so-called President.

Now, I can’t say as I have any idea, really. All of the things I expected to happen from the Bush Administration having a 90% approval rating following 9/11 never materialized. All of the things I expected to happen with my own individual life never happened. I simply continued to go about my business, and more or less ended up living my life like anyone else from my time and place of origination.

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