Dear Heavenly Father,
I thank you for the health and safety of my family and me. I am grateful to you for giving me another opportunity to do something wonderful on this earth in this life. I know that I am still a sinner, and don’t deserve any of this. What I truly deserve is eternal damnation, but I also know that I am saved by the blood of your Son, Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior.
I have been a petty, mean sort of man for so long, that I often fall back on the old habits of this fellow. I look for something to complain about around every corner, no matter how bright and beautiful the next thing is. I seek novelty when I should be seeking a deeper relationship with You. I seek out stories online of things I have no control over, when I should be praying to you to help me gain more mastery and control over my wayward self.
I have spent a lot of time training myself to be more of a tough guy, obsessing over how I would respond to any number of tough guys who disagree with my politics, instead of meditating on how I could be more humble and loving.
I have great health and little debt. I live in a relatively safe part of the world. I have a system of support thanks to my college degree and skin color. I have struggled some with poverty, but it was poverty brought on by my own foolish actions. I have no business complaining to You about anything at all in my life, for I am responsible for almost all of the things that haven’t gone as planned.
I am given an opportunity to be silent in Your Presence, and I run from it, seeking out random news stories and people I hardly know on Facebook. I am always trying to be stimulated and entertained, instead of humbled and re-focused–re-focused on You. I have spent too many hours of my life wistfully longing for what might have been or fantasizing about what can never be, and have ignored so many blessings that you’ve tried to bestow upon me.
Please forgive me of all my sins, and my own soul’s errant ways and impatience. Please give me the strength to face down the acedia that arises when the days of sameness seem to stretch out forever, so that I might be better equipped to be seeking out what I need to understand and do next.
Dear Lord, please bring comfort to my heart when it aches with sorrow for the ones I’ve lost. Please let them know how much I love them and miss them.
In you Son Jesus’ Name,