I want to be righteous and saintly. I want to be as sin-free as I can possibly be. I am sick of sin, and I am sick of justifying my sin as being acceptable simply because my society says it’s okay.
I would rather be sin-free and free of my former creativity, than have the creativity return along with my proclivity toward sinning.
I am so tired of losing my temper and getting angry at people who may or may not be trying to slight or one-up me. If their attentions are truly diabolical, I wouldn’t know, because I’ve already made the assumption that they are long before the other person opens their mouth to prove or disprove my theory that they are out to get me.
I am sick of thinking that drinking booze or m will actually make me happier, will put me into such a state that I will remain happy for some time to come.
I am sick of seeing old faces pop up in my mind with their words that might have hurt me or made me angry, and obsessing over what it would be like to get some kind of revenge upon these people.
I want to be more righteous than I was when I was a child. As a child, I sought to please my parents, and had no real sense of personal responsibility about what I was doing. I am calling all of the shots now–I am utterly responsible for my actions, and I won’t become a righteous person if I don’t spend time contemplating the awesomeness of God, thanking him for my life and health, and pleading for him to have mercy on me and help heal my terrible soul sickness.
I don’t really care what people from my past think–I have shut my Facebook page down because I feel like they were still getting into my head.